We are not free to pursue our dreams, or even to dream them, when we hold ourselves back with negative self-talk. Have you ever planted a garden? You can’t just drop the seeds on top of the weeds and rocks. You first have to clear and prepare the soil. Once the soil is prepared, it is then ready to receive the seeds and grow your crops. The same thing happens with our mind. Before we can grow our dreams, we need to get rid of the things that hold us back.
Have you been held back by the things you tell yourself? I don’t deserve to succeed. I am a failure with money. This diet will fail just like all the others. I will always be depressed. My life is a total disaster. Our self-talk can keep us from achieving or even believing in our dreams.
Up Until Now
I have learned a little phrase that helps me to work through my feelings and negative self-talk. Sandra Parkhurst, a licensed professional counselor, tells her clients, “Up until now…” That little phrase affirms the truth of the past while opening up the future to be different.
Up until now I have not handled my finances well. Up until now I have not controlled my eating. Even if you are not sure about your next step, just using “up until now” lets you acknowledge the struggles of the past while stripping away the judgements you have added to them. Up until now I have not succeeded, but that doesn’t mean that today will be that way. I can choose what to think and do.
For some of us, we hold ourselves back with our negative self-talk. I have done this most of my life. My biggest issue now is that I have been overweight/obese for over 20 years now. I have told myself that I am just going to be fat. That my diabetes will probably kill me and there is nothing I can do about it. I have tried to diet and it just doesn’t work. Either my will power is broken or my “want to” is not strong enough.
Put It Into Action
Then I decided that I would challenge myself to do 5 things for 75 days. I told myself that up until now I have been undisciplined, but today I will start this challenge and by God’s grace I will finish it. It has been a week and I am on track. I don’t know how much my health has improved, but I have not had one high blood sugar reading. And I am getting a big kick out of all the check marks in my planner for every task I finish.
Sometimes negative self-talk is a way to mask fear. Ruth Soukup wrote Do It Scared: Finding the Courage to Face Your Fears, Overcome Adversity, and Create a Life You Love. If you feel like fear is holding you back, you might want to give it a read. I am reading it right now and am hoping it will help me push through the dry days when I don’t want to finish my challenge.
The whole point of getting rid of negative self-talk and facing your fears is to free yourself to dream those big dreams and chase after the life that God planned for you. Up until now I may have failed, but now I am moving forward.
Like!! Really appreciate you sharing this blog post.Really thank you! Keep writing.